Too Small To Model, Yet Taller Than My Friends

Just what the title says.

I was working on Saturday and someone came up to me asking if I model. When I said 'No', he asked if I had ever modelled. My positive reply led to a disagreement over how I should/shouldn't consider myself a model. Apparently I have the face a figure for it. One little problem, I'm not very tall.

When I was measured at the doctors, I was said to be 5'4. I always thought I was an inch or two taller than that, but this is still short in terms of modelling. Most agencies require you to be 5'8 without shoes.

Also, like most girls around the Western world, I do not consider myself to be thin. I know that I am not fat as UK size 10 clothes are a little big on me now (need to do some major shopping), but I find my abs are getting strong enough to fade the hourglass figure I was once so proud of.

'Baggy' skinny jeans... Friend's house.

I know, I know, I have big hair. Now, when I see myself, I don't see what everyone else sees.
Models are 1) incredibly tall, and 2) incredibly thin. I love my food. I'm even eating as I type this. I eat quite healthily but every so often,, I binge on junk food... If I work out, I make sure to eat even more. Imagine me, trying to be one to them.. no thank you. I'M HAPPY BEING AVERAGE (for once).

Unconditional love,
Cazzie x

Dungarees!!

These have to make a comeback this season. I mean, who doesn't love them?

So I bought a pair in the Christmas sales in New Look, and I've noticed that they still have styles in store at full price. I've been addicted to dungarees for years, I have always loved them.
Some guy stopped me in the street yesterday, just to say that he loved them. We just chatted about how they should make a comeback this season, and wondered if they would suit him.

Like the first image.

This season, when the sun comes out with some warmth, I'm going to be wearing my dungarees rolled up a little, with a crop top. And white Converse of course. I adore my Converse, so if I can find an outfit that goes with them, I will wear it.

Oh, full length dungarees of course, the short ones just look like playsuit imitations... But dungarees can be worn in many different ways to show cute sides, and tomboy ones. It's all in the accessories and other clothing you choose.

I don't think I should ever do a fashion blog...

Unconditional love,
Cazzie x

P.S. If you find some skinny jean style dungarees, let me know because I really want some. Especially the high waisted ones. <3

Mainstream Shizz

I want to start off by saying that I am in no way a hipster, no matter what my friends think.

I've just gotten so used to not being a part of the majority that following the crowd has become a turn off.. I always felt like an outsider as a child, first because I'm half African and half white British, and second, I never felt like I belonged. In my first school, no one was mixed race. They were either white, black or Asian. I wasn't 'one of them'.

My friends always seemed to have happy, perfect lives. Both parents working, siblings they got along with and all the toys they wanted. Me on the other hand, my parents divorced by the time I was four. My mum couldn't work because she wanted to be there for me and my sister, and with no family that really liked my mum, she had to struggle on her own. I would always argue with my sister, which led to arguments with my mum, most of them resulting with the line "Why don't you go and live with your father!". Because my mum wasn't working, she couldn't afford the toys my friends got, cable/satellite TV or nice stuff in general. So I wasn't like everyone else to start with.

Secondary school definitely pulled me apart. People would wonder why I didn't act more 'black', why I was quiet, why I was me. I was scared to come out of my shell and show what I really liked. I got into anime and manga but was criticized for it. There was this one girl who thought I was copying her and tried to make me hate myself. I might have mentioned her before, I actually hated going into school. The last year was actually my worst year. I loved Kpop music for the first time, but I was called strange and uncool.

I turned to my sister earlier and said that "Kpop is becoming too mainstream... I don't like it." 

University is like a whole other life for me. When I'm there, I am truly myself. I'm not scared of the judgement, the looks and stares. I re-invented myself, as the confident me. That worked for about a week. Now I'm halfway between that and how I was before. Sure some people aren't open to the fact that I like different things, but I don't care anymore. I am myself and I could never be happier.

I don't just listen to 'mainstream music', I listen to anything I like the tune or beat to. I like The Midnight Beast, The Lonely Island, and The Band Perry. This is where I don't follow suit; Simple Plan, Mika, Evanescence, Fun, Taylor Swift, Eminem, Lil Wayne, Nicki Minaj, Lindsey Stirling, Big Bang, Nu'est, 2NE1, to name a few of my favourites. Yeah most of these are mainstream artists, but I don't check the Top 40 or anything, I just download the albums and any singles I like.

On the other hand, I also don't follow fashion. Like every girl, I update my wardrobe whenever I can, and buy what's in stores but my collection is quite small because I am so fussy. I get fed up quickly and my style is sometimes called; punky, quirky, cute, different, tomboy-ish, bright. It all depends on my mood.

IT'S ALL ABOUT BEING YOURSELF, AS LONG AS YOU ARE HAPPY IN YOUR OWN SKIN, WHO CARES WHAT THE WORLD THINKS! As long as you don't do anything illegal, or dangerous to others, it's all cool.

Be Yourself

I wouldn't really be able to describe this much better myself, and it really bugs me when people want to follow the crowds instead of being unique. I pride myself in not copying other people, I dress my own way, act my own way and choose to do things based on my morals and my personality.

"Gemma" is often telling me how she wants this 'Paul's Boutique' coat because everyone at her school has one, and she only wants certain branded clothes because of what others think. One, it makes things expensive and two, she looks like everyone else. At least if I try to find my actual sister in a crowd, I can based on her clothes or hair. If I look for Gemma, I look for the smallest black child around, not her sense of style or how she dresses.

I love Jenna Marbles, she's a great inspiration and makes some pretty funny videos like 'How to trick people into thinking you're good looking', and admittedly her older videos are the best ones. Jenna doesn't try to be someone else, and if you go past the fake tanned skin and blonde hair, you find that she isn't a bimbo, but an intelligent person with a great personality.

Just remember to:

• be creative
• be strong
• be courageous
• be ambitious
• and most importantly: be yourself

:)